The Diamond Dare Show: Quest for the Sword
by Amberdiamondswords
Summary: One year has passed since the Diamond Dare Show started and it should be a time to celebrate. But the celebration takes a turn for the worst when Sword's diamond sword starts to dissolve into diamond dust. Swords needs to retrace her steps on how she got her sword in the first place in order to retrieve a new one. Summary sucks! Dedicated to my one year anniversary on fanfiction!
1. Chapter 1

_**The Diamond Dare Show: Quest for the Sword**_

**It was normal day in the Diamond Dare Show studio.**

**It is pre-show time and Swords, Ratchet and Clank are doing their own things.**

**Now let's just get to the story already instead of doing this Star Wars intro rip-off.**

* * *

"Ratchet!"

The orange furred lombax looked up from his Pokémon Y game to meet the face of his small robot friend Clank

"Yeah pal?"

"Swords has requested to see both of us."

He set his 3DS down and folded his arms

"Did she actually request to see us, or did she say 'yo Clank, tell Ratchet to get his ass in here'?"

"That...may be...what she said yes"

The little robot cleared his throat

"But she still wants to see us."

The lombax sighed

"Alright, this better be good. Let's go."

The two walked down the hallway leading to Swords' office, but someone bumped into Ratchet while coming out of the break room. The man had a green work shirt on, beige khakis, and brown shoes. He also had neat black hair and mustache. Ratchet scowled

"Watch it Frank!"

"So sorry Mr. Ratchet, but I'm in a bit of a hurry. My Mustang is being towed for some reason!"

Frank ran down the hallway and flew down the staircase. Clank cocked his head

"I didn't know that Frank had a Mustang."

"I didn't know that he had a mustache."

The two continued down the hallway until they reached the final door. It was a purple door with a diamond window that read in black letters

**MS. SWORDS: MAIN HOST AND DIAMOND DARE SHOW OWNER**

Ratchet closed his eyes and crossed his fingers

"Please don't have a flag pole, please don't have a flag pole..."

He took a deep breath and opened the door. The first thing he saw was Swords' desk, which was a coated beautiful diamond paint. On the desk was a blue laptop, a teal 3DS, a half empty Coke Zero, and a Diamond Dare Show schedule attached to the top. Ratchet spoke nervously

"Uh, Swords, you wanted us?"

The black leather swivel chair that was facing the window behind the desk shifted slightly.

"My homies, the day has come, the day that I've been waiting a long time for. Today marks the day..."

The chair turned around to reveal a fifteen year old teenager with brown hair, purple eyes, and purple dragon ears, tail, and wings coming out if her. She was wearing a purple short sleeved jacket with a (also short sleeved) white shirt and purple pants outlined with diamond colored silk. But the most noticeable part of her was the diamond sword in her left belt loop, which could slice a telephone pole in half with one strike.

"...Of the one year anniversary of The Diamond Dare Show."

Ratchet gave a huge sigh of relief

"Oh thank god...thank god it's just that. Okay, well that's good."

"What? You thought that I was gonna kill you or something?"

"...Kinda"

"Dude, I wouldn't do that!"

"Thank buscus"

"No, I'm saving that for another day."

"Oh well okay-wait what!?"

"Ehehe. By the way, did you see that I had some Mustang get towed? I wonder who that belonged to."

"Uhh..."

Clank broke the two up

"So, what do plan to do on this special occasion?"

"I plan to put together the most fantastic episode of the Diamond Dare Show yet. Bigger than the 1,000 View Spectacular! I'm going to do something that we hve never done before."

"Be nice to the ninja?"

"No"

"Do only truths instead of dares?"

"No"

"Have the Diamond Dare Show follow the fan fiction site guidelines?"

"Bitch, don't be ridiculous! Turning the Diamond Dare Show into an actual story, ha! That's never going to happen."

Clank whispered to Ratchet

"Um...doesn't she know that the author is doing that right now?"

"Shh, it's better that she doesn't know."

"Doesn't know what?"

"Nothing!"

"Well alrighty then! As for what I'm going to do for the dare show-"

A strange noise cut off her sentence, she looked at her side and her eyes went wide. Ratchet's ears twitched

"What the hell was that?"

"N-nothing! Get out!"

"Uh...what?"

"I said get out!"

"Listen man, if it's that time for you, I totally understand. I went to health class in middle school."

"Wha-no you sick bastard! Oh my friggin' buscus Ratchet, there's a twelve year old in here!"

Clank cocked his head and was about to say something. Swords pointed at him

"Bot, don't you say anything! Anyway, I need you two to get out, now! I'll call you back later."

"Alright, whatever you say. Come on pal, let's go play Super Smash Bros."

"Okay, bye Swords."

She didn't respond, she had turned around in her swivel chair to face the window. The two left, leaving her all alone. She had something laying across her hands as she shook her head

"I...I didn't think that the legend was real."

* * *

**The Diamond Dare Show...in story form...MIND BLOWN!**

**I must warn you though, the story isn't going to be COMPLETELY funny. There will be some rare serious moments to help bring the story together.**

**Not a bad way to celebrate my one year anniversary on this site (Even though it's next Monday, but I was too eager). We get to learn where Swords, the diamond sword, and the Diamond Dare Show originated **

**Make sure to leave a review and smack dat Follow/Favorite button in DA' FACE!**

**This is Amberdiamondswords, Lordess of Diamond Swordness, pledger to Tobuscus, signing off!**


	2. Chapter 2

"Come at me, come at me! What you got R.O.B.? Huh? Nothing! You got nothin' on Marth!"

"Ratchet, do you really have to taunt my character every time we brawl each other?"

"Uh...yeah...OH! Oh there's a Smash Ball! It's mine!"

"I believe that I will get to it first."

"Oh no you don't! I shall throw you down to the ground!"

"And now I shall do this."

"Do wha-AW! You bounced off of ma' head!"

"I broke the Smash Ball, it belongs to me."

"Oh sh*t I'm getting away from you!"

"Face my laser eyes!"

"Stay away from me!"

"I have you cornered, and now you shall be defeated."

"No no no! Stop shocking me! It's not nice!"

"I may be nice in real life, but in video games I will beat you up."

"No! No! No! And I flew off the screen...stop being good at this!"

"I am afraid that is impossible for me to do."

"Yeah...yeah it is."

Ratchet tossed his Wii remote onto the table in front of him as Clank did the same. He leaned back on the couch and flexed his hand, which was cramping up from playing the game. Then, out of nowhere, he said

"What the hell was up with Swords?"

Clank cocked his head at the sudden question

"What do you mean?"

"What do you think I mean? She called us into her office then kicked us out three minutes later!"

"Well you did make quite a personal and fairly rude comment."

"I was just curious! She's a fifteen year old girl, what else would be wrong with her?"

"Maybe she's not feeling well."

"...Wait a minute. No, there's gotta be something seriously wrong with something?"

"Why do you think that?"

"You said bye yo her before we left her office right?"

"Yes."

"Did she anything in response?"

"Negative. She did not."

"Ah-ha! There's gotta be something wrong because Swords would never ignore you."

"...Oh my buscus, you're right...for once."

"Hey! I'm right sometimes..."

Clank was giving him a deep glare

"...Nevermind. What should we do about her?"

"Maybe we should just leave Swords alone for the time being. We know not to interfere with her through stressful times."

"Yeah, I guess you're right...as always."

"Hehehehehe"

"Well, maybe we should go check on the ninja while we have our free time. Taunt them with food or something."

"Ratchet!"

"Oh it's funny and you know it! I hear you laughing every time."

"..."

"That's what I thought. Come on, I have my key to the basement."

"Wait!"

Clank grabbed his little Celebi toy that Swords had bought him and followed Ratchet out of the room

* * *

"We've been in this cage for several days, being on this dare show just doesn't pay **(harmonica break) **There is nothing that we can do, I'm as miserable as my suit is blue **(harmonica break) **I'm so-OW!"

Kai threw a rock at Jay's head

"Jay, do us all a favor and shove that harmonica up your ass!"

"...Kai is such a frigging bitch, he should go die in a ditch **(Extra long harmonica break)**"

Nya, who was tiredly leaning up against the wall, shook her head

"Jay, please?"

"I will break this harmonica for you, my love."

"Then do it"

"...Then again this thing cost me like $250-!"

The door to the basement opened as Ratchet strolled in

"What's up fother muckers?"

Cole started twirling his finger sarcastically

"Whoo, Ratchet's here...and he brought his walking toaster."

"You are so lucky Swords didn't hear that or else she would have beaten the living crap out of you."

"Well, she's not down here. Is she?"

"That won't stop Clank from telling her."

Clank smiled a little devilishly

"No, no it will not."

Cole's eyes went wide

"Your toaster is evil!"

Ratchet shook his head

"He's not evil, just mischievous...and a squeak addict."

Clank squeezed his little Celebi toy, giggling at the resulting squeak. Lloyd sighed

"That toy is more annoying than Jay's voice."

"HEY!"

"The truth hurts bro."

"Shut up! So, what do you two want anyway?"

Ratchet leaned up against the cell bars

"Well, we were going to taunt you guys with a Snickers Bar but I...uh...dropped it-"

"He ate it on the way down here."

"Thank you...CLANK!"

"You're welcome."

"I was being sarcastic."

"You have yet to teach me sarcasm."

"Uh...oh yeah. Anyway, we also came down here to get away from Swords."

Zane looked up

"What is the problem?"

"I dunno. She called for a meeting, we heard a strange noise, then she kicked us out."

"Strange, are you sure that she's not on her-"

"NO, SHE IS NOT!"

"...Okay. Just making sure."

"I'm sure you were...sick bastard."

"What?"

"Nothing-"

"Ratchet, Clank!"

The two co-hosts turned around to see a young (like...20's young) light brown haired boy with a blue work shirt that said 'DDS CREW'

"Hey Calvin, what's the friggin' hurry?"

"I just saw Swords packing her bags. I think she's leaving!"

"What?!"

The ninja cheered

"YAY!"

Ratchet held up Clank

"I have a Clank and I'm not afraid to use it!"

"..."

"That's what I THOUGHT!"

Ratchet (still holding Clank) ran up the stairs to see what was happening

* * *

Swords searched through her bag

"Let's see...flashlight, Swords Mobile keys, iPod, 3DS, PSP, laptop, portable T.V., the complete DVD set of The Big Bang Theory-"

Ratchet burst through the door

"Swords what the hell is goin' on?!"

"Holy sh*t! Boy, you ever hear of knocking?"

"Uh...no."

"Oh...well um, I'm uh...I'm going away...for awhile."

Swords swung her backpack over her shoulder and headed towards the door. Clank looked at her sadly, then looked at her waist

"Where is your sword?"

She froze

"Uh...I uh...I shoved it up Frank's ass...and I'm uh...taking him to the hospital."

Ratchet pointed at her

"LIAR!"

"Now what you talkin' about Ratchet?"

"Everyone knows that you never take people to the hospital!"

"...Ugh, f*ck!"

Clank climbed over Ratchet's shoulder

"Swords, what is really going on here?"

"Alright, you guys REALLY want to know what's going on here?"

They nodded

"Alright..."

...

...

...

"Well I didn't say when."

"SWORDS!"

"Ehehe, I love pissing you off with that. Alright, come over here"

She lead them to behind her diamond colored desk. She grabbed a key from her pocket and unlocked the bottom drawer. She reached in and pulled out an item wrapped in a blanket. Ratchet looked at it strangely

"What is that?"

"That's the hardest part to say..."

She unraveled the blanket and her diamond sword dropped out. Only something was different about it. It was glowing some sort of blue aura in several areas. And those areas started dissolving into this shiny dust that just sprinkled onto the floor. Clank jumped as he climbed on top of Ratchet's head to get a better look

"What is happening to it?"

"Gather around children, it's time for Swords' Non-Christmas Special!"

"Oh god not another story, if only I could wait for another update to hear it."

* * *

**Swords sa-what the? Author's notes? DAMN YOU RATCHET!**

Ratchet: Go figure

**I swear to god I'm going to shove him into a cat carrier **

**Make sure to leave a review and smack dat follow/favorite button in DA' FACE!**

**This is Amberdiamondswords, Lordess of Diamond Swordness, pledger to Tobuscus, signing off!**


	3. Chapter 3

"Way to pave your way through the fourth wall Ratchet, good work."

"Thanks"

"But you left my swordians hanging last chapter, ya' dick."

"What happened to 'good work'?"

"That compliment died about eight seconds ago."

Ratchet face palmed as Clank tapped his foot, feeling a little impatient. Swords looked at him

"Now what you waitin' for Clanky?"

"You said tha-"

He glared at the name Clanky. God, how he hated that name.

"You were going to tell the story of some sort of legend?"

"Right right. Well, let's start from the beginning...gather around children, it's time for Swords' Non-Christmas Special!"

"Uhh...we don't have a place to sit..."

In one motion of Swords' hand, two diamond chairs appeared. Ratchet jumped

"Oh my god, how the f*ck did you do that?!"

"You didn't know that I had diamond magic? How the hell do you think I made my diamond palace?"

"...Frank's paycheck?"

"No, that's how I paid for my indoor pool and bowling alley."

"Oh...anyway, continue with this legend."

"ALRIGHTY THEN. It all started after the first episode of the diamond dare show...FLASHBACK PLEASE!"

* * *

AmberDS sat on the old mossy steps of the building she bought. It was old and worn out, with a few broken windows (one wasn't broken before the show). she sighed

"So...this is my great fan fiction? Who knew that a noob would get such a low income?"

She pulled out her paycheck

"Twenty bucks for one day, pathetic. Well...at least it's better then nothing-"

A strong gust came though the T.V. studios and blew the check right out her hands, being carried by the wind

"Aw, god damn it! Come here you piece of-"

She jumped up and started chasing after it. It lead her out of the T.V. studio and through the streets of other author's homes. She ran past a couple authors, who stared at her in confusion

"Hey Reevee, isn't that the chick from T.V. dare show?"

"I don't know magicwolf, I've been watching Pokémon for the last...wait what day is it?"

"Thursday."

"Uh...yeah, I think that's her."

AmberDS kept jumping up and down in attempt to grab her check, but the wind just kept going

"What the hell? Come back here and let me spend you on Totinos Pizzas!"

The wind suddenly started going crazy. The check circled around in the air, then made a ninety degree turn towards a woods area.

"What kind of windy bullsh*t is this?!"

She continued running after it towards the dark woods. She hesitated at the entrance though. A weird fog seeped from between the old tree trunks and weird animal noises echoed through the darkness. A small ripping noise caught her attention as she looked up and saw that her check was caught on a twig. She pumped her fist

"Yes!"

Then, a white owl came down and grabbed the paper, flying away with it

"F*ck!"

She was now running after the owl, not caring about the darkness that surrounded her. After a few minutes, the owl landed on a stump in the middle of a clearing. AmberDS bent over panting

"Bitch...give me...back...my...CHECK!"

She picked up a small branch and swung at the owl. The creature's eyes went wide a screeched at her, dropping the piece of paper, then flying away. AmberDS nodded

"Good riddance ya' rat with wings. Now all I have to do is-OH MY GOD!"

The owl came back and flew around her head, making her dizzy. The owl then grabbed her wrist and smack it against the tree stump

"OW!"

The owl then flew out of the sight, leaving AmberDS on the ground grasping her hand

"God that hurt!"

She sat up, shoving her check into her Minecraft wallet.

"Stupid bird...wait, what the hell is that?"

The tree stump that laid in the clearing had been knocked over onto its side. AmberDS rubbed her hand, she didn't think that she had hit the stump THAT hard. But-wait...is that...a hole?

It was.

A hole laid under the tree stump. AmberDS looked down into it, it was the beginning of a tunnel. She looked around the woods, no one was there. She shrugged and jumped into the hole. The tunnel below was small, so she had to crawl on her hands and knees. Her eyes widened slightly, the tunnel was longer than she thought. The only light source was these weird glowing rocks embedded in the sides.

"Hm, pretty. Now let's see where this goes..."

She crawled through the long tunnel, not knowing what was up ahead. she didn't stop (except when she kneed a pointy rock and cursed at it). Eventually, after a few minutes, she saw a light.

"Either I'm dead or I've reached the end of the tunnel."

She entered the light and found herself outside once again, only in some sort of mountainous area. She looked around, the dark woods were out of sight. Then, a cave caught her attention. It was glowing with an eerie blue light. AmberDS had really no choice but to go inside and explore. When she entered the cave, she realized that the blue glow was coming from the same type of rocks that were in the tunnel.

"Man, this is trippy."

She casually walked farther into the cave, occasionally dragging her hand against the sides to feel the weird stones. She noticed how extraordinarily smooth they felt. What she didn't notice was when she made contact with them, they glowed brighter. The cave area started to become wider, until it lead to a circular area

"This cave sure is weirdly shaped...hello, what's this?"

In the middle of the circular floor was a pedestal with a piece of paper laying on it. AmberDS walked up to it to see what it was.

It was a map.

"What's this map for?"

She carefully picked up the map and brought it over to a light stone to see it better. It was just some pictures of landmarks. She flipped it over just to make sure she didn't miss anything. she was surprised to find a poem written on the back

_You do not know it, but your quest has begun_

_For you my friend, are the chosen one_

_You found the owl and proved yourself worthy_

_Flipped the stump, and took the tunnel journey_

_This map shall lead to a priceless treasure_

_The worth of it cannot be measured_

_For in a temple, on a horizon_

_Waiting for you, is a sword made of diamond_

* * *

"Whoa, that's one powerful poem."

"Damn right it is!"

"so, what happened next?"

"After I found the map, I followed it and it took me on a horrendous journey. But then, I found the temple..."

* * *

AmberDS stumbled forward out of the bushes, falling onto the ground. She was exhausted, hungry, thirsty, and filthy. She coughed a few times to get the dirt out of her lungs, then sat up

"I've been through all the obstacles, so where is...the...temple..."

AmberDS's eyes sparkled as the sunlight shined down onto a glorious jungle temple. She got up off the ground and walked towards the entrance in an admiring trance. But she snapped out of it once she spotted the unbelievable long staircase. It was so long that she couldn't see what was at the top.

"The final obstacle, the most gruesome thing a human being will ever face in their lifetime..._stairs_."

She took a few determined breathes and pumped her fists a couple times, Then she charged up the stairs in a flash. Her legs were moving like a machine, her breath was light and steady. But after what felt like forever, she started panting and her determined run turned into a pathetic crawl. She gasped

"Man...I must be...almost there."

She looked down to see how far she was...

Eleven steps.

She face palmed

"I need to work out more. Okay girl, you can do this. Let's go!"

She continued her weak crawl up the what seemed to be several thousand stairs.

AmberDS grasped the top platform and tiredly hoisted herself up, panting so heavily that she didn't think it was too healthy. She rolled onto her back and sprawled out on the platform.

"Oh my god, that was awful...and I didn't even bring a greased up cookie sheet for going back down..."

AmberDS's eyes widened as she slowly rose from her relaxed position. For what laid before her was a pedestal with a diamond sword lodged in the top. She walked slowly up to the beautiful treasure. The pedestal it was in was surrounded by sharp diamond crystals the glowed just like the small stones in the cave. Her shaky hand reached forward and grabbed the handle. She climbed on top of the rock and gave the sword a small pull. Surprisingly, it started to slide out with ease. The sword came out completely, and AmberDS placed the blade carefully in her hand. It was a beautiful blue blade, and it was fairly sharp. She grasped the handle tightly and twirled the sword, then raised it into the air

"Oh-ho yeah, that's what I'm talking about-AH!"

The sword started to glow a weird light purple light in the middle. It traveled down the handle and into AmberDS's arm. Then it separated into her back, backside, and head

"What kind of f*cked up bullsh*t is this?! God it hurts like hell!"

The lights glowed brighter, then the manifested into shapes. The ones on her head into triangles, the back into these weird bottom pointy looking shapes, and the backside into a cone. AmberDS was in terrible amounts of pain, she looked at her sword

"What did this thing do to me?"

After she asked that, engraved words started to show in the blade

_You have found the sword_

_Now powers you shall gain_

_Just one wave of your hand_

_Shall relieve the awful pain_

"One wave of the..."

AmberDS opened her hand and waved it downward, and the pain immediately stopped. The light that was glowing in her body started to form as real body parts. the triangles turned into purple ears, the strange shapes on her back turned into wings, and the cone on her backside turned into a tail. She yelped in surprise

"Holy sh*t, I'm part dragon, I'm a freak...AWESOME!"

She looked at her sword

"What else can this baby do?"

More engraving revealed itself to her

_Your quest ends here chosen one_

_Now no one shall leave you in shun _

_Along with the sword you have a new power_

_In which people who don't believe shall coward_

_Chosen one, you are now a sorceress_

_Yet in one year you shall be powerless _

"Whoa...so I have powers now?"

AmberDS stared at her hands

"So, how do I get home? Do I just do something like this?"

She snapped her fingers, and she disappeared into thin air.

* * *

AmberDS appeared on top of the Diamond Dare Show studio building.

"Oh holy sh*t! It actually worked!"

She looked at the old run-down building she was on top of. Maybe with her new powers she could...

She smiled and twirled her new sword

"Let's see what I can do."

_Moss glows green on the building tonight_  
_Not a viewer to be seen_  
_A dare show of nothingness,_  
_And it looks like I'm the queen._

_These dares are coming in like dust blowing by_  
_Couldn't make this good, heaven knows I tried!_

_Welcome them in, humored they can be_  
_Be the good host you always have to be_  
_Just make them laugh, but they just can't_

_Well now they can!_

_Let them dare, let them dare_  
_Can't hold it back anymore_  
_Let them dare, let them dare_

_Face the crowd and open the door_

_I don't care_  
_What they're going to say_  
_Let the show go on,_  
_I'll never get bored of this anyway!_

_It's normal how my dare show_  
_Doesn't seem good at all_

_But now that I'm a new girl_  
_I'll answer their dare calls!_

_It's time to see what I can do_  
_To test the limits and break through_  
_No right, no wrong, no rules for me I'm free!_

_Let them dare, let them dare_  
_My dare show's on the rise_  
_Let them dare, let them dare_  
_Just see it through my eyes!_

AmberDS runs to the middle of the building and stomps her foot down, making the floor around her turn white like it was brand new

_Here I stand_  
_And here I'll stay_  
_Let the show go on_!

She waved her hands and stomps down both her feet, encasing the building in a purple light. The moss started dissolving and shining letters start appearing on the side of the building

_My power flurries through the air into the ground_  
_My soul is spiraling in diamond fractals all around_  
_And all dares will shine brightly like my brand new sword_  
_I'll always come right back,_  
_My audience is bored!_

Her clothes started glowing and her run-down outfit turned into a purple jacket outlined with diamond silk, a white t-shirt, and purple pants also with diamond silk. Her sword appeared in a loop hanging off her pants.

_Let them dare, let them dare_  
_I will never let them down_  
_Let them dare, let them dare_  
_This show will rule the town_

_Here I stand_  
_In the light of day_  
_Let the show go on,_

The studio building appeared like it was new. It was a beautiful shade of white a beige, with purple diamond letters embedded in the top side of the building that said 'DIAMOND DARE SHOW'

_I'll never get bored of this anyway_

* * *

"So, you sang a parody of Let it Go before Frozen even came out?"

"Yep."

"Does that make any sense?"

"Nope. And let's keep it that way!"

"So, what does this have to do about your sword disappearing?"

"Well, you see..."

Swords waved her hand over the fading sword to show the writing engraved in it

"I ignored the term 'yet in one year you shall be powerless.'"

Clank gave the saying a quick thought

"It's the Diamond Dare Show's one year anniversary, and you got your diamond sword the same day you started the dare show. So you've had the sword for one year, and it's disappearing."

"That's right, the sword is wasting away."

"So, why were you trying to leave then? Do you feel powerless so you can't continue the show any more?"

"Clank, if you weren't so cute then I would slap you for saying that. You see, the diamond particles falling off the sword are actually teleporting back to the temple where I found it in the first place."

"Why the hell is it doing that?"

"Because it's making another sword."

"What?"

"This sword can't die, so with every year that passes, it creates another sword to take its place. So I was leaving the studio to retrieve it."

"You mean you're going alone?"

"I went alone the first time."

"Yeah but, if you bring me and Clank, it'll make the journey so much faster."

"The answer's no."

"...I'll pay for your Omega Ruby game."

"Pack your backpack, be ready in five minutes."

Ratchet high fived Clank (...uh I mean low five...because Clank is so...they hit palms okay?!)

"Hey, how did you say you found the temple?"

"Followed a map, went on a dangerous quest and almost died several times."

"And how are we going to find it?"

"...Follow a map, go on a dangerous quest and almost die several times."

"Oh...cool!"

* * *

**Holy long chapter!**

**Sorry I didn't post this sooner, my Wi-Fi was out for awhile **

**ONLY THREE MORE DAYS OF SCHOOL LEFT! Thursday next week I'll be a free girl!**

**Make sure to leave a review and smack dat follow/favorite button in DA' FACE**

**This is Amberidiamondswords, Lordess of Diamond Swordness, pledger to Tobuscus, signing off!**


	4. Chapter 4

"Hey, I'm ready."

Ratchet walked into Swords' office with Clank following behind. Sword looked at him irritably

"I thought I told you to pack your backpack?"

"I did."

"Then where is it?"

"Hello? Clank is my backpack!"

"Uh...oh yeah. Hey make yourself useful and help me pick out six Pokémon to take with me."

"Why are you only bringing six?"

Swords stared at Ratchet for a few seconds, then slapped him across the face

"OW! What the hell was that for?!"

"Because you should know that a trainer can only carry six Pokémon with them!"

"...That really hurt!"

"Good. Now help me pick out some Pokemans."

She tossed the pokeball bag on the floor in front of Ratchet, who hesitated to look inside it

"Oh um...uh...w-which one d-do you want?"

"Uh let's see...I'll take Voltz, Twilight, Heroa, Slushy, Sensei Wu, and Nadar."

"Right...what Pokémon are those again?"

"Oh my god Ratchet. Pikachu, Charizard, Latias, Articuno, Alakazam, and Blastoise!"

Yes! I knew that! Now let's see here...uh..."

Ratchet dug through the bag and pulled out six pokeballs

"Here they are!"

Clank looked a little nervous

"Maybe you should make sure that they're the right ones."

"Boy, do you doubt me?"

"Yes, yes I do. Very much."

"...Fine. I'll prove you wrong."

Ratchet tossed the six pokeballs, which exploded with a blue light and out came six Pokémon. A Lucario, an Aegislash, a Delphox, a Serperior, a Blaziken, and a Diglett. Swords rubbed the back of her head

"Uhh...that's Ratchet, Clank, Delta, Queen, Freya, and Diggy Hole."

"I know!"

"You are a sad, clueless little cat. Clank, do you mind?"

Clank quickly dug through the bag and retrieved the correct six pokeballs while returning the wrong ones back into the bag

"Thank ya' kindly. This is why you're the brains of the duo."

Swords walked out of the room as Clank looked up at Ratchet with a smug look. Ratchet pushed him inside the pokeball bag and zipped it shut, then walked out. The bag bounced around a bit, with Clank's struggling voice occasionally was heard. Ratchet came back in and unzipped it, then grabbed Clank and dragged his confused being out of the room.

* * *

Swords kicked the basement door open as Ratchet caught up with her

"What are you doing?"

"I'm taking your advice. The more people that tag along, the faster and easier it will be. So I'm taking the prisoners with us."

"So they can take some bullets for you?"

"I never said that...but yes."

She jumped off the second step and onto the dirty basement floor

"What's up mother f*ckers?"

Jay took cover

"Oh god! The show's starting!"

"No no no, I'm here to let you out for something else."

Cole perked up

"Freedom?"

"Hahahahaha don't make me laugh. I'd rather give Frank a promotion then let you guys go free."

"Is that an offer?"

"No Frank, it is not."

"Awwww..."

Kai slumped on the rock he was leaning on

"So what are you letting us out for?"

"I'm going on a quest to retrieve a new diamond sword and I need you losers to help me."

"What? No!"

"Ehehe, you guys don't have a choice."

"Hm, what do you guys think?"

"No."

"Hell naw!"

"Negative."

"No way!"

"I'm not going!"

"I'd rather stay here."

"Absolutely not!"

"I would rather have the devourer bite me again!"

Swords reached into her jacket

"Hey, remember that gun that I used in the first episode?"

"Yea-"

_BOOM!_

Swords shot the gun upwards to gain silence

"Alright, listen up! Y'all are my bitches now!"

She paused for a moment

"With the exception of Zane and Clank."

Ratchet looked at her with a mad face

"Hey! Why am, I your bitch?"

"Ratchet, you've been my bitch since the day you started working here. If it makes you feel any better, you're probably the best bitch I have."

"Uh...thanks I guess?"

"Yeah you better be grateful. Now let's get a move on!"

Swords shot the lock on the cell door and let everyone out

"We're going to need a new lock."

As everyone ran up the stairs, Ratchet wondered

"Who's going to watch the studio while we're gone?"

"I'm gonna assign that job to Frank."

Clank jumped onto Ratchet's head

"Are you going to pay him overtime?"

Hahahahahahaha...ahh Clank you're funny. I don't know what Frank and Cole were talking about in episode 19. You're a funny robot."

"I was not jok-oh nevermind."

"Alright, you two make sure that the prisoners don't run away and I'll tell Frank that we're leaving."

"Got it."

"And take Twilight just in case."

She tossed a pokeball to Ratchet as they went in separate directions. She ran down the hallway and poked her head into the break room where Frank was reading a newspaper

"Frank we're going on a dangerous quest that may kill us all and I need you to stay and watch the studio GOODBYE!"

Frank just sat there silently, then turned the newspaper page

"Have fun."

Swords walked down the hallway towards the exit

"...Ehehe...overtime, classic Clanky."

* * *

**Sorry that I didn't update yesterday, I started a Pokémon fanfic (Psst...READ IT)**

**I am SOOOOO excited for E3! I wonder what they'll reveal (I saw Ratchet and Clank in the promo video, so I am VERY excited)**

**Make sure to leave a review and smack dat Follow/Favorite button in DA' FACE!**

**This is Amberdiamondswords, Lordess of Diamond Swordness, pledger to Tobuscus, signing off!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Half an hour later**

Everyone (except Swords) was waiting outside to go on this quest. They had grown so bored that they had to resort to one of the most gruesome games ever created...

_Go Fish_

"Ratchet, got any fives?"

"Go fishin' bitch."

"Hey! Don't call me that."

"Just show me if you have any twos fother mucker-"

Swords kicked open the exit door and strolled out of the studio while watching something on her iPod. Ratchet stood up

"There you are! It's been a half hour where have you been."

"Yeah sorry, they released the second trailer for the Ratchet and Clank movie at E3."

"You watched the whole trailer? How long was it?"

"Oh the trailer itself is a minute long, I just watched it thirty times."

Ratchet face palmed

"Of course you did."

"Hey! I had a right to watch it that many times! The author woke up at 2:30 in the morning just to watch it five more times!"

He looked at the sky

"Really?"

A voice boomed from the sky

"Go figure!"

"I will not!"

Suddenly, Ratchet slammed into the side of the wall

"Wait I what?!"

_SLAM!_

"Okay...I'll go figure."

Swords grabbed her backpack strappes

"Alright homies and ninja, let's move out!"

She grabbed Ratchet's arm and pulled him out the wall

"Come on Jeffery (if your childhood was awesome you'll get that reference)"

She dragged the lombax across the pavement while Clank walked right next to him

"Are you just going to let her drag you the whole way to the woods?"

"Just uh...just as soon as my vision comes back. Is she laughing at me?"

"No, she's watching the E3 trailer again."

"Of course she is, she's f*cking obsessed with that movie!"

"The movie _is_ about us, you do know that right?"

"...Keep watching dem trailers Swords! Ain't nothing wrong with you being addicted! But could you let go of me? My ass is slowly being grated off my body!"

* * *

Swords: Okay okay I got one. Would you rather go to school on weekends...or watch Gnomeo and Juliet and Rango every week day

Jay: Ahhhhhh...that's a tough one

Kai: Uh I didn't see Rango, how was it?

Swords: Terrible, one of the worst movies I've ever watched

Clank: Can you give me a rating of both movies?

Swords: Rango 0.5 and Gnomeo and Juliet gets a negative nine

Ratchet: Do we get to choose what classes we have

Swords: No, it's a four class schedule with two hours each

Zane: What classes?

Swords: Social Studies, English, Math, and Health

Cole: Oooooh, Health. NOT good...

Clank: What's Health class?

Ratchet: Clank my friend, it's time that I tell you about the Delibirds and the Combees-

Swords: Ratchet, no! We mustn't let Clank breed, there can only be one thing so adorable in this universe!

Ratchet: ...You're right!

Swords: Now let's all step back as the author changes the writing style because we're here

"There we go."

Everyone slowed down as they approached the opening of a dark forest. The same mist from the story seeped between the tree trunks. Swords kept a hold on her gun

"Alright, let's go. And if ANY of you make a Wizard of Oz reference I'm gonna shoot you in the foot, so close your mouth Jay."

"Awwwwww..."

"Stay in a group, and don't get lost. Ratchet, I want Clank on your back. Zane, keep an eye on the pokeballs in my belt loops. And Cole and Nya..."

The two looked at her

"I ship that."

"HEY!"

"The truth hurts Jay."

The group stick closely together as they entered the woods. Ratchet had a concerned look on his face

"Hey, how do you know that something isn't going to happen us? Like...something bad!"

"Well, I've been here before."

"Yeah but you were by yourself. what's going to happen to us?"

"Hm, I don't know. I guess all I have to say is...NICE KNOWIN' YA!"

"Not funny!"

"Ehehe, it's kinda funny."

Clank looked over Ratchet's shoulder

"No, it is not."

"You're right Clank, it's not funny."

Ratchet face palmed as the area around them started getting wider. The sudden screeching of a bird scared the crap out of all of them. A white owl flew past them and deeper into the woods. Swords pointed

"That's it! That's the owl!"

Ratchet picked up the pace

"Don't let him get away!"

The group started running after the bird, Kai yelled to Lloyd

"What the f*ck is going on?!"

"I have absolutely no idea!"

The owl came into view once again, but then flew to the right and disappeared into the trees. Ratchet bent over panting

"Damn it! We lost him!"

Swords grabbed the back of his shirt

"We may have lost the owl,"

She lifted him back up to make him look up

"But we did find out destination."

There it was, the same stump that was discovered one year ago. Jay pushed through the group to get a better look

"A stump? Finally, I have a place to take a piss-"

Swords grabbed him and held him up face to face

"Boy, you piss on that stump and I'll piss on your face!"

"That does NOT sound pleasant."

"Good-HOYA!"

She kicked the stump over to uncover the hole underneath it. Sensei looked at it

"What's this?"

"It's a hole grandpa, and we're goin' down there! Who's first?"

No one said anything

"...Fine! I'll go first! Ratchet, you're behind me."

"I'm not going behind you!"

"Why? You get the honor of looking at my sweet ass!"

Ratchet sighed as Swords jumped into the hole. Lloyd nodded

"She does have a pretty sweet ass."

Everyone turned to him with awkward looks

"...Is what a crazy person would say...Heh-heh."

* * *

**I'M SERIOUS GO WATCH THE E3 TRAILER OF THE RATCHET AND CLANK MOVIE IT LOOKS SO AWESOME!**

**Tomorrow is ma' last day of school! WHOOOOOO!**

**Make sure to leave a review and smack dat follow/favorite button in DA' FACE!**

**This is Amberdiamondswords, Lordess of Diamond Swordness, pledger to Tobuscus, signing off!**


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